February is the month of love. Everywhere you look is going to be decorated in pink and red flowers and balloons and hearts. You start getting messages about the various days like, hug day, kiss day etc. that lead up to Valentine’s Day. You just smile and delete the messages or walk past the “cupid” decorations, but inside you must be bubbling with anger and sadness.
Being single doesn’t mean that you need to find Valentine’s Day a depressing occasion. Maybe, you don’t have a date, maybe you’re not going to buy red flowers and chocolates for someone else but you can still treat yourself and feel good about where you are in life.
Just because you don’t have a date, doesn’t mean that you are unlovable. You don’t have to scold and criticize yourself endlessly. The first relation you need to improve is the one you have with yourself. Why would anyone want to be with you if you don’t want to be with yourself? A happy person is attractive to others. So, look into the mirror and tell yourself, “You are lovable. I really love you.” It may be hard and sound silly at first but say it with all conviction, warmth and love.
You don’t need others to splurge on you when you can do it yourself. Buy a gift for yourself that you wanted so badly. Send yourself flowers and chocolates along with a little love note declaring love for yourself. Spend some money on yourself. It’s ok to be selfish now and then. At least you don’t have to face the stress of choosing what to buy for someone else; neither do you have to fake exclaiming with joy when you get something that you didn’t like. You know what you want so you will definitely like it.
Make other plans
Plan something you really wanted to do. You can finish that novel you wanted to read, take a relaxing bubble bath, or watch your favorite series back to back. Having plans to do something concrete will help to take your mind off the fact that you are single. As long as it’s something you look forward to, it will change your whole mood. Plan a night out or a night in with other single friends where you can sing, dance and just party.
Do something nice for someone else
Getting out and doing something, especially a kind deed, can serve as a wonderful reminder that Valentine’s Day can be what you make of it, regardless of who you’re with. Valentine’s Day is to celebrate love; you don’t have to limit that to couples. Show your love to your grandmother who remembers you often, spend it with your parents, recalling all kinds of fun stories from your childhood, spend it baby-sitting your niece or nephew when your sibling wants to go out with their partner. Share your love with others.
Alone doesn’t have to mean lonely. So, declare this Valentine’s Day as a “Me Day” and have fun. Give yourself the love and attention that you would give to someone else.
-Sana Panagar, Clinical Psychology, AccioHealth
This was published on http://www.acciohealth.com/learn/with-love-to-myself/